They Think It Be Like It Is But It Don't

Today Idontknow and I tried to play the most current version of Hypnophobia in Garry's Mod. Naturally, it didn't work out for a number of reasons, but this is to be expected. We weren't able to get a server working but it's probably for the better since my lack of a graphics card would mean the game would be a horrible confused mess of psychedelic colors...



...you know, more then it already is.

Oh! That reminds me, today's lucky number is 85.3%! Whoever is sitting in Row 4, Seat 2 just won a brand-new Mark III travel machine, congratulations! It is now a distinct, but improbable possibility that the map MAY be done by the beginning of January.

MAY.

What else? Well a very nifty entity in the Portal 2 build of the Source Engine has been brought to my attention, the so called linked_portal_door. From what I've seen so far it can lead to very intriguing topography:





I am going to make an abstract map for Portal as soon as possible and it is going to be all up in this. You realize that this makes Penrose Triangle shaped maps easy? Nay, child's play? I don't even want to try and consider all the totally bizarre possibilities this opens up. It would be the map supreme. It might be the gateway to my life-long dream of being able to break people's minds from across the internet.

Imagine if you will, a map with the same aesthetics of of Insomnia, but still clearly a Portal-style test chamber, twisted beyond any clear function and host to such anomalous curvatures of space-time that the Human brain can't help but surrender to the mematic hazard it's presented with. There would be checkerboard tiles of course, and the whole map would be an amalgamation of a city, swamps and the clean, bold lines of Aperture Science. There would be vortices of brightly colored light and floating platforms in an inky black abyss. Doorways that lead to rooms that are bigger on the inside, hallways that lead back to their start while staying perfectly straight, upside down rooms, the possibilities would be endless. And there wouldn't be a single peep about lemons or cake or whatever.

And player would be forced to burn Wheatley at the end. Nice.