Thrash Jazz Assassin

Picture it: I'm sitting in my living room. I'm watching Star Trek, eating a sandwich. I think everything is fine and good when suddenly there's a knock on the door. My grandpa gets up to see who it is and we all stop what we're doing to listen in. Because, hey, it might be more relatives. And suddenly I hear the voice on the other side of the door:

"Hi, I was wondering if we could speak to Tyler." And suddenly, my blood runs cold.

"...Chapman." I mutter as I get up to go to the door. Everyone watches as I get up and start muttering some excuse for what's happening.. I suddenly remember, he was in town that day. He made the drive here, I should have expected this.

He's standing outside, talking to his friend and I realize I'm in for a terrible time. They notice me and start spouting gibberish but I don't have any of it. I go back inside and try to explain to my grandparents. But somehow, they accept what's happening. They're not outraged. They're not mortified. So, with nothing else to do to save myself, I get my car keys and head out.

Basically, Haydn drove down here from LA and demanded I co-star in a movie he was making. And really, I had no choice:



Keep in mind, I had no idea he was going to do this. I knew he would be in town, sure. But there was no script, no plan. I never even saw that violin until a few seconds before filming began. And everyone's lines were made up on the spot too. All in all, it was actually a really neat improve exercise.

But then again, I feel like I could have given a better performance if I had a script. Or, you know, if anyone bothered to tell me I was going to be in a movie that day. But no one ever tells me anything, so I guess that wasn't going to happen. What surprised me was how okay my grandparents were with it. I'm not sure I like the idea of people trusting me enough to run out of the house late in the day and filming avant-garde movies whenever I like.

This wasn't the first time I've been a part of one of his projects though. We filmed a tense police drama at the library once. But unfortunately, that plan fell through. I played a tough-as-nails police chief chewing out the main character, McLonewolf for botching a case. I feel like I did a better job that time because, let's face it, I just have the right face for a police chief.

Well, that's all for now. I'll be sure to write about it next time my acting career creeps up on me.

Creepy Crawlies

You know what the world needs more of? Music videos of mutant insects. Thankfully I found one:



I mean look at that, I can't even tell what half of those things are. It's all photo-manipulation of course, but I would love to see creatures like that in real life. Honestly I don't know what I like more: the crazy cubist looking arthropods or that I have no idea how this was made. I mean, if I had to guess I'd say they layered multiple videos over one another, so what we're seeing are actually multiple shots of the same bug at once, turning them into the monstrosities in the video. But that's really just a guess. I especially like the praying mantis with the headdress, or how the millipede is the only normal one in the bunch.

Now that I think about it, it reminds me of this video by Simian Mobile Disco:



I like this one almost as much, chiefly because it's so colorful. But it could definitely use some help in the kaleidoscope insect monster department.

Second Empire, First Post About Kentucky Bluegrass

First thing's first. I hate the new Blogger editor layout, but I've already complained about that.

But besides that? Well I've just found a very...interesting comic while perusing around TVTropes.

It's called Second Empire; the story of a renegade Dalek's struggle against a decadent and ineffectual regime and it's mission to create it's own empire. One of the first things one notices when reading is that there absolutely no mention of the Doctor for the first two hundred pages (at least). Try to picture that, 100%, nonstop Dalek action. Daleks on every single page.

It's all made with CGI. Normally I would scoff at something like that but it works the look very well.

It's only fair to warn you: these Daleks are very different from their T.V. counterparts. It's actually kind of jarring. Each of them had much more of an individual personality than usual and has honest-to-goodness emotions besides hate. It's like they think they're people or something. Plus, in spite of being about homicidal aliens there's innumerable little comedy bits sprinkled throughout.

It's about nothing but Daleks without being too dark yet still has a compelling story and action scenes. I'm giving Second Empire a nine out of ten; If you liked the TV21 comics this will be equally appealing. Give it a look-see.

Speaking of the TV21 comics, I found a gallery that's compiled every single one of them in a convenient package. Like Second Empire it's all about the Daleks being sneaky and evil without any interference from obnoxious men in blue time machines.

Aaaaand that's all for now. Nothing else is going on unless you count Obtuse Goose being a whiny little girl and demanding I make a blog post about how much I hate him. Because apparently, I don't get to decide when I hate something enough to make a post about it anymore. Well you know what? Fine. I'll have you know that he's let Borderlands 2 completely take over his life and he's that much less of a man for it.

All the weapons are randomly generated and it's all cel-shaded like some kind of dumb baby game. So not only are you constantly reminded that you're playing something made by Fischer-Price or some other dumb baby company, but you, as the player, are completely stripped of control over what kind of weapons you have.

What's that? You have, like, a shotgun with a sniper scope on it? Too bad, you're stuck with it until the random number gods decide to give you something less ridiculous.

Plus, he listens to Kentucky Bluegrass because, according to some tortured logic and a quadratic formula he made is equal to classic metal. In what exactly? I don't know, he hasn't told me.





I just don't understand. I don't understand.