Tuesday, July 19, 2011

Album Covers of the Gods

Ladies and Gentlemen, it is time...

FOR ALBUM COVERS!

SUPREME!

Wouldn't You Like It? by the Bay City Rollers


No, I wouldn't like it. At all. Honestly, were you boys even aware that they had taken the picture!? Look at that one at the bottom, he's transforming into a were-squirrel. That one to the right? He was thinking about how much he would like to be wearing footie-pajamas right now instead of doing a photo-shoot, he was startled out of his day-dream when the camera flashed. The one in the middle thinks he can get all the ladies with that poofy bird's nest do and pasty chest.

The only one who looks like he knew what was going on is leftie there and I'm still questioning his sobriety.

De-Loused In The Comatorium by the Mars Volta


"No Mr. Bond, I expect you to die."

Many Moods by the Al Russ Orchestra


The elves of Rivendell are well known for their music and merrymaking so it was a big surprise to everyone that their debut album did so poorly.

In the Court of the Crimson King by King Crimson


That is the face of someone running from Tarkus if I ever saw one. Incidently, it reminds me of another color-themed monarch.

And don't worry, there is a My Little Pony version featuring Spike.



You know, in case you were wondering.

Polonase Blankenese durch Gottlieb Wendehals


Gottlieb ähnelt mein Biologielehrer aus der Mittelschule, dies sowohl erschreckt und verwirrt mich. Ich kann mir nicht helfen, aber denke, dass sie einen in die gleichen sind, und er ist nur mit der Farce, um das Gold aus den verbotenen Tempel zu stehlen.

Ja!

Walking on a Dream by Empire of the Sun


Just in case you were wondering what it would look if David Lynch and David Bowie did a reboot of the Star Wars franchise.

Butterfly by Cheryl Dilcher


Skittles got into Cheryl's "special" tea bags the morning of the recording. By the time he had regained consciousness he was covered in exotic feathers and glitter. It was only later that he realized he had painted a self-portrait in the style of Louis Wain. The producer loved it so much he decided to make it the official cover art. They saved a bunch of money on an artist, Cheryl avoided explaining the tainted tea to the record company and everyone was happy.

Except Skittles, he's still having acid flashbacks.

Reborn by Orion


Ethel Merman had succeeded in destroying Don Elliot after he harnessed the power of jazz for his evil deeds. Afterwords, she went on to have a successful film career. But soon, a challenger appeared. Her old nemesis, Orion, had returned.

"But you were eliminated by the mighty Tarkus!" She cried from atop of the Pink Flamingo Hotel.

"I have returned, I am...Reborn." Orion said as he fired his bedazzler beam.

Michael Bolton by Michael Bolton


Tasteless, cheap and just dripping with sleaze. I defy anyone to find it attractive.

Plus the cover is awful too.

Get Away From Me by Nellie Mckay


If my sister was ever an album cover she would be this one.

Menudo


It was a great day for everyone. The boys got those fancy new windbreakers that they've been wanting and still had enough money to get their picture taken at Sears.

BUENO!

El Toque es Unliiigolazo!!! Por Rulli Rendo Orquesta y Coros


Cosmo Kramer no permitió que su mutación inesperada bajarlo, con el fondo amarillo que apenas se puede decir que él sigue siendo brillante.

ME GUSTA!

Country Church


What secret is so terrible that they must hide it behind those mustaches?

HEINO!


Heino! Do not dare to hide yourself from his dapper blue sweater.

3 comments:

Chanel said...

Wench

mom said...

like like like like!!!
Its first thing in the morning for me and im sitting here chugging coffee so you know I find nothing funny. Then I go to your site and am looking over my favorite posts by you...ALBUM COVERS. and I find myself * laughing * OUTLOUD

Shadgrimgrvy said...

That's the power of album covers!

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